Validation

I know that i shouldn't need it, or want it. That no one else can define me or my worth, but i somehow keep coming back to the need for validation from others, perhaps it is because i have a hard time believing in myself so i think that if others see it in me it must be true so it is ok to believe in it.
the problem comes in when someone doubts you or questions you, you have no faith in yourself so what faith others put in you is completely gone.
it is like running on empty but having little gas money you get $2-3 worth of gas here and there but in between you feel like you are running on fumes or trying to figure out how to get more even when you still have a little. you are a junkie looking for your next fix.
the problem is it will never be enough....but how do you start to believe in yourself and your worth without some of it to jump start the process, and then how do you not become dependant on it.
i guess it has to come from God. the problem comes in when you feel like you've screwed up too much and are no longer worthy of His favor, and while you know that could never happen you have to keep trying to convince yourself of it.