Pissed off...here come the walls

So i'm a bit pissed off mostly at myself but a bit at some others. i know i probably say too much and it scares people off, but i just don't get why i can't help but do it, if someone wants to get to know me why shouldn't they get to know me, who i am how i am. it gets frustrating to try and be without pretense yet when i do it always comes back to bite me on the butt because shortly after that they go away. i almost feel like adding the disclaimer.."welcome to my crazy, the exit is to your left, watch your step as you run out..."
is it any wonder i build up walls and only let people so far in?
but my problem is what to say and how to say it to people who upset me. i either walk away or blow up i want to say something but don't know what or how.

funny how earlier this week i just ran into a wall i didn't even realize i had put up.
it's funny how you come to many realizations once you hit a wall about yourself and why you do the things you do. or why you keep someone at a distance until you find it or it is brought to your attention.

either way building the walls or running into them hurt.
and tearing them down requires help
...any takers?